Im a 23-year old woman starting up my (our) own business with two of my male classmates who I currently attend college with, aged 20 and 19. Weve been working together since 3 months ago when we took up a huge project offered by an investor (who happens to be a mutual family friend of ours). Prior to this, we barely knew each other, but now I have come to trust and respect them as my brothers.The three of us always--equally--talk about the importance of building a solid friendship outside work. The two guys and I have had a few moments when we share our thoughts, feelings, and personal life outside work. However, we dont (havent) really hang out outside the meetings because everybody has another job and live in different suburbs. And with non-romantic male friends I usually refrain from showing affection or calling them up "just because"--I show that I care by respecting them, listening to them, asking their opinions, being there for them, and celebrating victories with them.Lately I feel that Ive been chasing around my two colleagues a lot for work. And although I let the guys do most of the talking in the meetings, they probably still feel that Im rather dominant because of the way I work behind the scenes. On one hand, we have a lot of work to do because there is much at stake, and sometimes I feel that theyre leaving me with all the homework. On the other hand, I dont like bugging the guys and appearing either bossy or like a beggar.Why is it that the further I proceed with this project the more insecure I feel around these guys? Due to what I perceive as their lack of initiative--both professionally and personally--I sometimes fear that they might abandon the project. How can I lighten up both our professional partnership and our personal friendship so that we can feel more comfortable around each other? I do believe that these guys care about me just as much as I care about them, but I seem to have this emotional need to feel secure and loved by them (not romantically but more as their big sister)... and I dont feel that need met, probably because I keep business conversations (i.e. most of our conversations) so businesslike.I would really appreciate some good insights as this would help us work better in building the company and giving back to our community. Thank you!
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